us.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf said: "Sometimes in life we become so focused on the finish line that we fail to find joy in the journey... Doesn’t it seem foolish to spoil sweet and joyful experiences because we are constantly anticipating the moment when they will end? Do we listen to beautiful music waiting for the final note to fade before we allow ourselves to truly enjoy it? No. We listen and connect to the variations of melody, rhythm, and harmony throughout the composition. Do we say our prayers with only the “amen” or the end in mind? Of course not. We pray to be close to our Heavenly Father, to receive His Spirit and feel His love. We shouldn’t wait to be happy until we reach some future point, only to discover that happiness was already available—all the time! Life is not meant to be appreciated only in retrospect."
I've been home from Rexburg now for nearly a month. That means... WE'RE GETTING MARRIED NEXT WEEK!!!! How crazy is that?
Crazy is the word I'd use to describe a lot of things. It's funny now looking back, you know to a whole four weeks ago, and feel like the long distance would never end. Long distance relationships aren't the most ideal or romantic kind of relationship. And as I've slyly mentioned before, I hated it. But looking back on it now, I'm grateful for that long, oh so very long, distant relationship.
You are able to learn a lot about people in such a situation. We knew we liked each other a lot in person. It was fun to go out on dates, go watch movies, go to our usual peewee golfing, play games with friends and family... it was fun, and it was easy. Austin and I are just that kind of people, we enjoy doing stuff and being with people. And it was fun just cuddling on the couch to a good, scary movie (yes, we're so romantic it's not even funny). I think the most fun part of it was that it was easy. Us falling in love was... simply easy.
We learned a lot about each other in a short amount of time. We learned about each others' hopes and goals, quirks, ticks (like how I move my leg when I'm super mad or annoyed), tickle spots, fears, how we interact with each other and other people, learned that we don't have issues with PDA (sorry Dalldorf family). It was fun getting to know each other. But it wasn't until we left each other that we learned the most random and important things about one another.
He learned just how much of a klutz I am. I was constantly telling him about bruises and falls I was having. A lot of those incidents happened while on the phone... like the time he made me laugh so much I rolled off the couch and fell onto a plastic cup, leaving me with a cup rim bruise on my thigh. I learned he doesn't like texting. He learned how dramatic I am, and how I literally worry about everything. I learned how calm he is, and how he reacts to those freak outs of mine (he's a champ). He learned more about my insecurities, as hard as it is for him to understand them and unnecessary they may be sometimes. I learned about some of his struggles too, and what he's had to overcome. He learned I'm a hypochondriac. I learned he's just as stubborn as me sometimes. He learned to not put up with my crap. I learned not to put up with his either. He learned that I'm such a goof and just how odd I am. I learned that he can literally get over something in a minute and be perfectly content within two. He learned I am not so good at that.
Okay, clearly I can go on and on and on and on... he learned that too ;)
What I'm trying to say is, we learned to love each other... all of each other. We learned some things about each other that weren't all that pretty. We learned how to love each other. We learned that we're good at arguing, but we're good at fixing those arguments, too. We learned how to communicate with each other. We learned how we express or or feel loved, and how sometimes these are done differently for each other. We learned how to trust each other (even though he may think I haven't completely). We learned we have definite different ideas of when is a normal hour to go to sleep. We learned that we're meant for each other... we made each other our soulmate. I didn't believe in soulmates until him.
Without the romance of dating, I continued to fall in love with him. It wasn't any sweet acts, it was just him being him.
Austin's one of the first things I thank my Heavenly Father for every day. He is the first thing I think of when I wake up, and the last thought on my mind when I go to bed. Whether they're always good thoughts is a different story. I KID. Okay, maybe not kidding on a few nights and mornings. Oh my heck, I'm awful.
ANYWAY, relationships are work. But that's what makes them better. The work for us was in fact work. Things aren't always rainbows and butterflies. I love him more because of the work and effort put forth into our relationship. I admire this man, all that he is, and all that he is doing. I love his laugh. I love that smile of his. Especially when he smiles with his teeth. I love that he lifts me up, calms my worries (which if you know me, I'm worrying always). He makes me feel like I'm of so much worth and that I'm beautiful. I love the way that mind of his works, even though for the life of me I don't understand it. He makes me want to be better. He makes me want to be stronger. He makes me want to never stop falling more in love with him. And I can't imagine life without him.
I'm so grateful for the time I've had to get to know Austin. Even from a distance. I'm grateful for the man that he is, and the one he is continuously becoming. I am grateful for the blessing of knowing him and the opportunity of loving him. &I'm so grateful that I get an eternity of continuously loving him and getting to know him better. But for now, I'm grateful for the journey. The journey I get with him. The journey is us in the world. & the journey of us is beautiful.

PS I GRADUATED!!!!!!! Austin came to support me and pick me up. Additionally, my wonderful mother-in-law and sister-in-law (I guess they're still not technically my in-laws yet.. but I say what I want!) came to my graduation! I absolutely love this family I'll be joining. They are incredible.

My sisters and their families were also there for me. It was so good to be with them. I LOVE my sisters and their husbands and children. It was SO hard to leave them... poor Austin felt so bad when we were leaving Rexburg and I was BALLING because I had to leave them. But I'm excited to be with them next week for the wedding:)

And it still blows my mind that I'm graduated. &that I'm getting married next week. I don't know if I'm ready for the real world... or if the real world and Austin can handle me....